I “sing” an ode to toilet paper.

The present situation in Norway — the local population grabbing toilet paper as if it were the main staple of the Norwegian Kingdom — has pushed me into reflections on my distant past.

Yes, imagine: it turns out I had a “difficult childhood,” and my tender places experienced the “bitterness” of Soviet newspapers! Yes! Every Soviet family subscribed to the newspaper Pravda. They “recommended” taking out a yearly subscription right at workplaces and institutions. There were special “members” of the party and the trade unions who handled subscriptions on the spot.

And even if someone wanted to subscribe, for example, to a fashion magazine (oh, how hard that was!), they had to take Pravda “as a load,” plus Komsomolskaya Pravda, plus the newspaper Trud. In the end, the fashion magazine went to the local bosses, and the most advanced ladies at the enterprise got the all-Union magazine Rabotnitsa.

As a curious teenager I liked reading that practical women’s magazine. Especially the columns “Useful Tips” and “Knitting.” I think that reading those tips and putting them into practice influenced my later “household” development, and also survival in the post-Soviet years. And I could never have imagined that something like this would happen here, in Norway — some kind of frenzy… over paper, or over pasta.

In the end the supplies settled down; it was only in people’s heads that Quarantine took up residence.

I have a habit of watching Norwegian news together with my Norwegian husband over a cup of evening tea. And today they showed one minister who had caught “corona,” has a positive test, and is giving an interview, I think, via Skype, from his home. He looks wonderful, no signs of illness on his face.

I immediately gave my husband my opinion. He laughed and agreed — yes, “he might at least have sneezed or coughed once.” But if I had not spoken my mind, that episode would have gone unnoticed. M-yes… Norwegians are not in the habit of criticizing or of being “suspicious,” of supposing, reasoning, “believe–don’t believe”….

So. I am finishing writing now, because it is already late. I “solemnly” promise to write further, but not today.